For the most part, when we feel out of place it’s due to our personal feelings and our blockages. When we assume something about another person and even assume their feelings toward us, we create a fake wall between us. That fake wall that we invent creates problems within the relationship and all relationships. It does this because if we can create one fake wall with non-beliefs and false assumptions, we can do it over and over again. How many times have you seen someone you know and they don’t say hi to you? What’s your course of action? Do you walk up to the person and say hi and talk to them or do you cower and walk away thinking the entire time about how rude that person is? Realizing that the person might have not heard you, is entirely an interesting thought and can be affirmed or negated by going up to them and saying hello. Without doing due diligence, we are left to our own assumptions and at the time we create our own false walls based on our assumptions.
When we take a step further with this mode of thought and inspect our relationships by examining how we feel internally, what we think versus what is, and what is real, we can modify our actions and thoughts properly with honesty and just cause. In all situations, we must understand the situation and understand the people involved. The most difficult undertaking in this world is to understand the people around us. Humans as a race, see things differently. Lets take a postcard picture of a beautiful beach scene for example: Every person on this planet would have a different idea of the scene in itself not to mention the feelings and personal thoughts they have about the beach. Taking that into consideration you can understand why it’s ever so difficult to get your thoughts across and taken the way they are suppose to be taken without others’ perceptions and misperceptions involved. In order to be an excellent communicator, you have to know what you want to say and convey it exactly as it is to be conveyed and the person you are communicating with must understand it and perceive it as it is to be perceived; otherwise you are not communicating effectively.
In the future, when you see someone that you haven’t seen in a while, instead of thinking how that person hadn’t called you and why that person doesn’t say hi first, make the first move, you wont be sorry. When you say hi, you are taking the proper initiative, being forthright, and not allowing your false wall of assumptions to change how you feel about this person and additionally to not change you as a person by turning you into a hiding or brooding individual. By taking the initiative only a few outcomes will come about:
- That person will be happy that you said hi and you two will pick up where you left off.
- Varying derivatives of outcome one. They have been out of the country, lost your number, extremely busy with work/family, family/death in the family, and/or they felt like you had blown them off and had their wall of assumptions up.
- You’re truly not friends and/or the person is not a positive person in your life, and be happy you know the truth now rather than later.
Motto: “It’s always better to know most things than to carry the burden of not knowing and always wonder.” aB