The Pros and Cons of Dating Apps

This post was written by Rhonda Wasserman

Original content by Ashley Berges

Are you recently single and wondering what to do next? Have you been trying to meet someone organically and having no luck? Perhaps you have decided to try online dating. Online dating can seem scary. There are both positive and negative aspects to it. It is good to know what you can expect ahead of time and learn how to navigate it. 

First, let’s examine the positive aspects of dating sites

The first great aspect of a dating site is that everyone is going to the same place looking for the same thing. Everyone is there looking to meet someone to have a relationship with. 

Another great aspect of a dating site is that you can create your bio/profile. The bio is something you have written by yourself, expressing who you are and information about you. It allows you to express what you are looking for in someone else. 

A third positive aspect of a dating site is that you can communicate with people before meeting them in person. It allows you to communicate and message back and forth before an in-person meeting. This allows you to start a rapport with them without physically being there. This may help weed out the red flags before an in-person meeting. 

A fourth positive feature of online dating is that you are not confined to meeting people organically. Dating apps allow you to meet a lot of different people online. It allows us to meet people that we may not have just based on our day-to-day activities.

Another great aspect of dating sites is that you do not just have to accept who you meet organically. Sometimes we settle when dating organically because the person is there and available. With online dating, we can open up our horizons and meet people who are out of our immediate location.

A final positive about online dating is that it allows you to meet others especially if you work from home.  Unlike when we work in an office, we are alone and secluded when we work from home. Online dating allows us to meet other peopleWhen we are using online dating we are not forced to go out to bars to meet people. Going to bars to meet people may be out of our value system. Online dating gives us another way to meet people on our terms. 

However, there are a few drawbacks to online dating that we should be aware of. 

It is important to be aware of these disadvantages and know what to expect. We need to keep in mind that the negatives of being on a dating site are similar to the negatives of dating organically.

Whether it’s a dating app or organically dating, we are going to come in contact with people who have not worked on themselves. They have not done the work to understand who they are and what things in their lives have gotten them to where they are today. As a result, they may be bringing a lot of their past trauma to the table

Another negative aspect is that we are 5 to come into contact with people who lie about who they are. Most likely they have lied about some of their information. This can also be the case when you meet someone organically as well. We need to remember that some people will be presenting false information or dated information about themselves.

Receiving inappropriate messages is another negative aspect of online dating. People may send us inappropriate pictures and messages. This can happen with both organic and online dating. We have to learn how to deal with this appropriately. One suggestion is to go ahead and delete the message, not deal with it, and move on. Do not let these messages overwhelm you if you receive them. 

We must realize that when we are connecting with people on dating apps we might meet someone who will not stop reaching out to us. We need to have boundaries in those situations. If we are feeling overwhelmed or stressed, we need to tell them that we need to take a step back. This is appropriate because the last thing we want to feel is fear or be stressed out about not responding. If we feel pressured and they are not willing to take their time, then they are not the right person for us. 

There is a chance that you will get ghosted when using a dating app even when you think things are going well. By being prepared for this we will be ready for people who are not emotionally solid. These people would rather ghost you than tell you the truth. It is better to be ghosted by them sooner than later, especially after spending more time and energy on someone who is not emotionally solid. 

Messaging on dating apps can also be an issue. When we message someone on a dating app they may not respond promptly or not at all. It is important to allow the time to pass without feeling as though they are ghosting you. If they do not respond at all do not take it personally. A lot of times when someone does not respond we tend to take it personally. If someone is uninterested or can’t respond, do we want to put our energy into that or move on? If they don’t respond, then it was not meant to be. It is hard, but at the same time, it is not about us, it’s their choice. 

The last thing to be aware of is that some of the people will have a different lifestyle than we do. We need to accept that reality. We do not have to change our lifestyle. There are a lot of people out there in the world. We can find people who have similar lifestyles to what we have. If we are consciously aware of what we want in our lives, we will need to hold people up to a similar standard as well. 

There are both pros and cons of online dating. The content has been provided to you to inform you, not to scare you. We need to be aware and informed to keep us knowledgeable and safe when it comes to dating of any kind. It is good to go into a situation and know what we may or may not be dealing with.

Watch both the pros and the cons of dating site videos right here:

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