Stop being Sucked into Other People’s Drama

This post was written by Rhonda Wasserman

Original content by Ashley Berges

Have you ever been sucked into some else’s drama? Have they sucked you into their lives and issues? Before you realize it, you are dealing with all their issues that do not affect you. It’s time you figure out how to stop getting sucked into other people’s drama. 

We often get sucked into the drama and do not even realize it is happening.

When it comes to drama the first problem that arises is that we take sides. When we are asked to take sides or we take sides, we need to think about what we are doing before we do it. Ask yourself, “why do I need to take a side?” Consequently, when we deal with other people’s drama, we get involved with things we should not get involved with. We allow someone to tell us the role we are going to play, the side we are going to take, or what we are going to do. 

It can be interesting and exciting to be a part of someone else’s drama, but at the same time, we can end up in the middle of something we don’t want to be a part of. 

It is important to be aware of the signs that indicate when to stay out of the drama.

 One sign is when a friend or family member wants you to take sides in an argument they are having with their spouse, friend, or family member. What good is this going to do for you? Most likely it is an argument that does not involve you. Odds are that if you do take sides and the argument is resolved, someone will have animosity toward you for taking sides.

Remember that it might be very difficult for you to believe someone when they are telling you how awful someone else is, especially if you haven’t seen any proof of their claims. The person wants you to get on their side, but you cannot prove that what they are saying is true. When this happens you need to take a step back and tell them that you care about them, but you have not seen any of what they are telling you, and you do not want to be involved. If someone is your friend, they will not pull you into their drama. 

Another situation to be aware of is divorce. When someone close to you is getting divorced and you care about both people involved, you need to step back. To remain friends, it’s best to step back. If they reconcile and you have taken sides, where is that going to leave you? If you chose a side and they get back together, you may lose both as friends. Divorce leaves a lot of pain, and anyone involved in the divorce could end up hated when the dust settles.  

When someone is trying to pull you in, ask yourself, “if what is going on affects you.” Another question is, “is this beneficial or necessary for me to get involved with?” If the answer is no to the previous questions, you need to take a step back. This is telling you that there is no reason for you to be involved.  Hence, you do not need to be dragged into and controlled by someone else. If they do not understand what you are doing then most likely they were not your friend to begin with. Friends respect other people’s time, stress levels, and family obligations. 

If you find yourself in this type of situation and you are asked to take sides, you need to analyze whether this benefits you. Is it necessary for your life? If it is not necessary, have the conversation, being open about not wanting to be involved, that you care about them, and that you are not taking sides. If they are truly your friends, they will understand, understand that you care and that you do not want to make waves.

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